How to Avoid Becoming Retail Roadkill

Black Friday is now in our rear view.  We’ve swiftly passed Small Business Saturday, leaving us with Cyber Monday looming ahead.  As tempted as I was to leave the house to join the masses as they crowded the floors of every retail space, I instead opted to couch it and wait for the deals to come to me.  

How do I personally avoid getting trampled during the holiday season by my fellow humans and turning up on an unfortunate Worldstar video?  I fallback on my hermit crab instincts.  That’s right—I stay home.  From the safety of a reclined position, I sift through piles of fresh emails promising not-to-be-missed savings and gifts with purchase.  Don’t these fools know I’m holding out for free shipping?  

Discount FOMO has worn off the savings savvy lot of us.  Miss Friday?  You’ve still got Monday.  Dismissed Monday?  Discounts only get more desperate as we creep closer to Christmas.  Even if you find yourself down to the wire you know that free expedited shipping usually kicks in just days before the official day of gift giving.  While I almost always have something in the bag weeks ahead of time, I have been known to cram mid-December.  This Santa sometimes has problems filling every stocking but her own.  I can’t help it.  My fancy sock drawer does not fill itself.  This is my sock season to shine, damn it.  Anyhow, reclusive tendencies aside, I do make exceptions.  Be sure to stay tuned for future fashion field trip notes...