The time is almost here for this year’s much anticipated Met Gala.  On the eve before the first Monday in May, let us gather round the crystal smart phone screens to do some pre-gala outfit forecasting.

Anna Wintour has already prophesized that feathers with be a popular choice.  It’s an informed prediction, coming directly from Susan Sontag’s “Notes On ‘Camp’”.  The quote I’m referring to states, “Camp is a woman walking around in a dress made of three million feathers.”  I’m guessing these feathers will arrive in the form of collars, arm hole adornments, head dressings and skirt trimmings.  Coincidentally, feathers are the last of the animal products yet to be banned from major fashion houses (with a newfound code of ethics).  Fur is out.  Feathers are in...for now.

The best fashion is camp.  It’s posed as something to be taken seriously, but to the lay person, it is almost always impossible.  This is why you’ll see normal humans pull out a garment from a rack, lean over to their companion and say, “Who on earth would wear that?” And this is the part where I chime in to say, “I own it in red.”  The best part of the Met gala is that the guests are always game for a bit of dress up.  They are the people who ‘own it in red’.  Though, one thing that will not be seen in red this year is the carpet.  Anna has hinted at a completely different color (or perhaps, colors) this year.  I’m hoping for a print or no carpet at all.  A yellow brick road would do nicely.  

I do have a few designers in mind who I think may be dressing some of this year’s guests.  Obviously, the usuals, your Saint Laurent, Givenchy, Giambattista Valli, Versace, Christian Siriano, Comme des Garçon, Dior and of course Brandon Maxwell.  Do I need to mention Viktor and Rolf?  Clearly there will be something giant and tulle with some verbiage we have yet to have seen.  I mean, there has to be.  I’m hoping to also see some things from Attico and Ashish.  

The event will be sponsored by Gucci, because who better than creative director, Alessandro Michele, to back an evening of camp?  In this case, I can maybe think of a couple other names, but the list is short.  I truly hope someone invites John Waters, that’s all I’m going to say.  I’m hoping to see some vintage pieces come out of the archives of Moschino, Mugler and Marc Jacobs.  Certainly we’ll see these pieces in the exhibit, but hopefully on the guests as well.  Which leads me to a list of guests whose ensembles I am most interested to see

Lady Gaga—of course she must be the most over the top, as Co-chair, but she usually is anyway so... 

Katy Perry—who almost always veers toward camp for every occasion  

Billy Porter—see any previous award ceremony outfits  

Jeremy Scott—who will undoubtedly be dressing Katy Perry, but who also has a his own image to uphold

The Kardashian-Wests—I only hope that someone other than Kanye dresses Kanye

Last, but definitely not least:

Dapper Dan—because he is ICONIC.  Nuff said. 

In closing, I believe we are about to see a whole lot of glitter and sparkle and volume and height.  All of these at once if RuPaul shows up.  I do hope to see queens of every kind—but especially of the drag variety.  I think there could have been no better theme this year, because if ever there was a time we needed frivolity, it is now.  Seriously.  (But not really.)